Was reading 1 Sam 1 last week - it is one of the greatest short stories ever written. Not a name, place or detail seems insignificant.
What struck me most, however, was when Hannah was crying out to the Lord to "remember me." Later in the text, it says, "The Lord remembered her."
As I dove into the Hebrew meaning of the word, "Remember" it is so much more than just remembering to pick up some eggs at the grocery store. Hebrew verbs always seem to be far more active than passive.
When Hannah cries out, "Remember me" she is saying, "God, lovingly act on my behalf!" And then, God remembered (lovingly acted on her behalf) her.
I just found that beautiful. I've found myself all week praying for friends in crisis, "Lord - remember her - not like eggs on a grocery list - but lovingly act on her behalf."
And he has - and his lovingkindness has been exquisite!
www.paulagamble.com
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Friday, April 21, 2006
Kosher Eavesdropping
Inspired by my friend Matt Mikalatos I have eavesdropped on someone and will share it here...
Stepmom: "So are you going to make spaghetti for dinner - or is that breaking kosher?" (Meaning they were still within the 7 day passover unleavened bread regulation)
Stepson: "yeah - may as well. I already broke kosher. I ate a bacon double cheese burger. Flour in the bun, pork in the bacon, and dairy and meat together. All I needed to make it a complete blowout is a meat milkshake."
I chuckled at this little conversation and thought, "Now there's some commitment to your faith....NOT."
Then God reminded me...how easily I "fudge" on what he asks of me...
And...well, this little eavesdropping proved to turn my judgment into conviction.
Thanks Lord
www.paulagamble.com
Stepmom: "So are you going to make spaghetti for dinner - or is that breaking kosher?" (Meaning they were still within the 7 day passover unleavened bread regulation)
Stepson: "yeah - may as well. I already broke kosher. I ate a bacon double cheese burger. Flour in the bun, pork in the bacon, and dairy and meat together. All I needed to make it a complete blowout is a meat milkshake."
I chuckled at this little conversation and thought, "Now there's some commitment to your faith....NOT."
Then God reminded me...how easily I "fudge" on what he asks of me...
And...well, this little eavesdropping proved to turn my judgment into conviction.
Thanks Lord
www.paulagamble.com
Monday, April 17, 2006
New Life on Easter Day!
After a great Sunday celebration at church, a man came up to my friend to talk to her about her keyboard. She felt the need to share Christ with him, so she said straight out (I love this about her!), “Ray, do you know the Lord Jesus Christ personally?”
“I used to.”
“Well, how’d you like to sit and look at the Bible and what it says about Him?”
“Okay.”
For the next hour or so the two of us (me believing that going late to my brunch and K leaving 2 hours late to drive to Tacoma to have easter with her daughter) shared scripture and asked questions. At one point I said, “Ray, you don’t need more courage to stop sinning – even greater courage is required to just let Jesus love your wounded heart!”
At that, he started bawling like a baby. We prayed – asked him to pray first, it was a slobbering beautiful thing. Then invited some men in our church to come over to make it not so awkward. Jason, our children’s pastor, actually took the baton, and led Ray to Christ. After praying, with more tears falling down Ray’s face, dear, dear Jason reached over, and with his thumbs wiped his tears saying, “I have no greater privilege than to wipe your tears – but one day, there will be no tears…”
It was really remarkable! And really inconvenient! I was late to my brunch with my neighbor, K should have been in Tacoma by the time we finished, and all of us had growling stomachs. But…no worries. The kingdom of God is NOT about us & "giving birth" is rarely convenient!
Friday, April 14, 2006
In Hindsight...it's good Friday
A scandalous day, really. The disciples - men & women - were crushed and confused; befuddled and beside themselves. Their Lord and friend now arrested and facing an unjust and inhumane trial and punishment. He talked about it with them beforehand - but they were either too busy with their own concerns of greatness and didn't really hear, OR, they just didn't think it would really happen.
But here it was - really happening. And these heroic, intimate followers of Jesus - the ones who had seen Jesus turn water to wine, walk on water, heal the lame and blind and just a week ago see him raise Lazarus from the dead...the ones who had themselves cast out demons and healed and served and had a front row seat to all of Jesus' teaching...now, in a seeming blink of an eye, deserted Jesus and fled.
Those are such discouraging words - deserted & fled. Anyone who has been a human being on this planet for more than a couple decades cringes in remembrance of that feeling. Sometimes I wonder if that hurt Jesus more than the nails ripping through his tendons and bones...
The basis of all desertion and fleeing is fear and self-protection. Despite their intimacy and personal knowledge of Jesus, in the muddle of the passion week, they, in the words of The Message, "cut and ran."
Was Jesus too obtuse for them? If he had been clearer, would they have understood and reacted differently?
I doubt it. Human nature is human nature. AND in the flurry of the week's events - from his triumphal entry to his anointing by Mary, to this strange Passover meal in which Jesus stooped to wash their feet, to singing triumphant Hallel (praise) songs while walking to a garden under the full moon of a crisp spring eve; to having stomachs so full of food and hearts so full of grief that they could not even stay awake to pray - they missed it.
Jesus isn't missing it. He's in agonizing sorrow - praying so intensely, his sweat falling like drops of blood. He knows the cross is before Him - He knows his close friends will all desert Him - "Take this assignment away...it's too much...but it's not about me. So Thy will be done."
The disciples are indifferent and sleep through Jesus' painfilled petitions. They are, however, awakened by a hoard of Roman soldiers and Jewish religious leaders carrying torches, swords and clubs. Judas is at the head of the mob, politely betraying Jesus with a kiss. Peter, arising out of his slumber, whacking off Malchus' ear. Jesus says, "I'm not here to lead a rebellion - I'm not who you think or want me to be." Then he reaches out and heals Malchus' ear.
It is in that flurry the disciples "cut & ran" - scurried away like a hoard of cockroaches exposed to a sudden light.
Jesus says to Judas, "Why the charade?" (The Message)
Yes - why the charade?
Sometimes I'm very discouraged by the disciples' desertion. I'm discouraged because even though I know I have moments of eager and expectant faith - I have plenty more where I try to pretend that the cross/death is not part of the equation. I'd prefer more cush - a good night's sleep as opposed to out of control, surrendering prayer. I prefer the charade.
Jesus says of Peter: "There's a part of you that is eager, ready for anything in God. But there's another part that's as lazy as an Old dog sleeping by the fire." (The message - Mt. 26:41ish)
B*I*N*G*O - yes, Bingo was his name oh...the dog...
Yup - me too. My spirit is willing, my flesh is weak.
With that many people armed with torches & swords, winding down from Jerusalem into the Kidron valley on a clear night with a full moon - Jesus would have seen them coming. He could have hid & fled. His spirit AND flesh (unlike our own) was willing, not weak.
Isn't it comical - Jesus goes out and asks, "Who is it you want?" Everyone there knows they want HIM...but he makes his betrayer and abusers own up to their misdeeds. He doesn't let them continue with a charade, "oh, greetings Rabbi - we're just 200 soldiers out on an evening walk in the cool of the garden." Why do abusers always twist things to look so innocent?
Perhaps that is one of the greatest pictures of His love - knowing full well they wanted to mock him, spit on him, and humiliate him with death on a cross. Yes - in the midst of a chaotic, jumbled mess of betrayal, arrogance and a sweaty show of force against an innocent (but a threat to their comfort/controlling charade) man...Jesus walks straight into it. Prayed up & seemingly no fear.
With hindsight being 20/20 we so easily chastise the disciples. But how many times does my laziness override my eagerness? How many times do I let prayers fall by the wayside in exchange for sleep or temptation?
Today - the day after the bewildering night of Jesus' arrest - the day we now call "good" because we know the end of the story - I need to let that chaos stay with me. I need to let myself be disturbed & discouraged by my own desertions - whether they be my failure to speak up for Jesus or whether it be my choice to over-indulge my body, mind and emotions with the lesser loves of this world that only pseudo satisfy.
Today's a day of grief...
Sack cloth & ashes
wailing & weeping
Less for the death of a friend. No, I share the disciples' humanity. Let me weep for my own propensity to fall asleep and flee.
If Jesus stayed in the grave - Christianity would remain a mere religion - which pretends to honor a higher being or "force", but is really only all about me.
Lord, may I be adequately disturbed and disgusted with my propensity to flee & desert you for lesser loves & self-protection. May I loathe it so greatly that when I get to Sunday and the tomb is empty - oh - now let my feet not run away, but instead run to tell others, "He is Risen!"
What Thou O Lord Hath suffered - Was all for sinners' gain.
Mine, mine was the transgression - and Thine, the deadly Pain.
Lo here I fall my Savior -
Tis I deserve Thy place....
www.paulagamble.com
But here it was - really happening. And these heroic, intimate followers of Jesus - the ones who had seen Jesus turn water to wine, walk on water, heal the lame and blind and just a week ago see him raise Lazarus from the dead...the ones who had themselves cast out demons and healed and served and had a front row seat to all of Jesus' teaching...now, in a seeming blink of an eye, deserted Jesus and fled.
Those are such discouraging words - deserted & fled. Anyone who has been a human being on this planet for more than a couple decades cringes in remembrance of that feeling. Sometimes I wonder if that hurt Jesus more than the nails ripping through his tendons and bones...
The basis of all desertion and fleeing is fear and self-protection. Despite their intimacy and personal knowledge of Jesus, in the muddle of the passion week, they, in the words of The Message, "cut and ran."
Was Jesus too obtuse for them? If he had been clearer, would they have understood and reacted differently?
I doubt it. Human nature is human nature. AND in the flurry of the week's events - from his triumphal entry to his anointing by Mary, to this strange Passover meal in which Jesus stooped to wash their feet, to singing triumphant Hallel (praise) songs while walking to a garden under the full moon of a crisp spring eve; to having stomachs so full of food and hearts so full of grief that they could not even stay awake to pray - they missed it.
Jesus isn't missing it. He's in agonizing sorrow - praying so intensely, his sweat falling like drops of blood. He knows the cross is before Him - He knows his close friends will all desert Him - "Take this assignment away...it's too much...but it's not about me. So Thy will be done."
The disciples are indifferent and sleep through Jesus' painfilled petitions. They are, however, awakened by a hoard of Roman soldiers and Jewish religious leaders carrying torches, swords and clubs. Judas is at the head of the mob, politely betraying Jesus with a kiss. Peter, arising out of his slumber, whacking off Malchus' ear. Jesus says, "I'm not here to lead a rebellion - I'm not who you think or want me to be." Then he reaches out and heals Malchus' ear.
It is in that flurry the disciples "cut & ran" - scurried away like a hoard of cockroaches exposed to a sudden light.
Jesus says to Judas, "Why the charade?" (The Message)
Yes - why the charade?
Sometimes I'm very discouraged by the disciples' desertion. I'm discouraged because even though I know I have moments of eager and expectant faith - I have plenty more where I try to pretend that the cross/death is not part of the equation. I'd prefer more cush - a good night's sleep as opposed to out of control, surrendering prayer. I prefer the charade.
Jesus says of Peter: "There's a part of you that is eager, ready for anything in God. But there's another part that's as lazy as an Old dog sleeping by the fire." (The message - Mt. 26:41ish)
B*I*N*G*O - yes, Bingo was his name oh...the dog...
Yup - me too. My spirit is willing, my flesh is weak.
With that many people armed with torches & swords, winding down from Jerusalem into the Kidron valley on a clear night with a full moon - Jesus would have seen them coming. He could have hid & fled. His spirit AND flesh (unlike our own) was willing, not weak.
Isn't it comical - Jesus goes out and asks, "Who is it you want?" Everyone there knows they want HIM...but he makes his betrayer and abusers own up to their misdeeds. He doesn't let them continue with a charade, "oh, greetings Rabbi - we're just 200 soldiers out on an evening walk in the cool of the garden." Why do abusers always twist things to look so innocent?
Perhaps that is one of the greatest pictures of His love - knowing full well they wanted to mock him, spit on him, and humiliate him with death on a cross. Yes - in the midst of a chaotic, jumbled mess of betrayal, arrogance and a sweaty show of force against an innocent (but a threat to their comfort/controlling charade) man...Jesus walks straight into it. Prayed up & seemingly no fear.
With hindsight being 20/20 we so easily chastise the disciples. But how many times does my laziness override my eagerness? How many times do I let prayers fall by the wayside in exchange for sleep or temptation?
Today - the day after the bewildering night of Jesus' arrest - the day we now call "good" because we know the end of the story - I need to let that chaos stay with me. I need to let myself be disturbed & discouraged by my own desertions - whether they be my failure to speak up for Jesus or whether it be my choice to over-indulge my body, mind and emotions with the lesser loves of this world that only pseudo satisfy.
Today's a day of grief...
Sack cloth & ashes
wailing & weeping
Less for the death of a friend. No, I share the disciples' humanity. Let me weep for my own propensity to fall asleep and flee.
If Jesus stayed in the grave - Christianity would remain a mere religion - which pretends to honor a higher being or "force", but is really only all about me.
Lord, may I be adequately disturbed and disgusted with my propensity to flee & desert you for lesser loves & self-protection. May I loathe it so greatly that when I get to Sunday and the tomb is empty - oh - now let my feet not run away, but instead run to tell others, "He is Risen!"
What Thou O Lord Hath suffered - Was all for sinners' gain.
Mine, mine was the transgression - and Thine, the deadly Pain.
Lo here I fall my Savior -
Tis I deserve Thy place....
www.paulagamble.com
The Good of Technology
I just got off the phone in a worldwide prayer conference call. Some of us in the US responsible for sending and shepherding our folks had an open line where people could call in for specific prayer - from E. Asia, Croatia, Europe, Latin America...while not everyone did call in, we had a great time lifting our teams before Jesus.
What a joy to lift all of their "communication difficulties" (such a euphemism for team conflict) to the Lord - asking him to be the peace that helps them to walk in step with Him and one another.
What a joy to exalt Jesus - the Supreme Supremacy - and to ask them to hold all things together as these teams try to finish out their next month or two with strength and courage in the midst of the weariness.
I just think that it's cool to be able to pray in real time for the needs of our missionaries!
If you want to read some of their blogs you can go to
http://gnwstinters.blogspot.com/
and check out some of the links on the right.
www.paulagamble.com
What a joy to lift all of their "communication difficulties" (such a euphemism for team conflict) to the Lord - asking him to be the peace that helps them to walk in step with Him and one another.
What a joy to exalt Jesus - the Supreme Supremacy - and to ask them to hold all things together as these teams try to finish out their next month or two with strength and courage in the midst of the weariness.
I just think that it's cool to be able to pray in real time for the needs of our missionaries!
If you want to read some of their blogs you can go to
http://gnwstinters.blogspot.com/
and check out some of the links on the right.
www.paulagamble.com
Thursday, April 13, 2006
NEWSFLASH - It's not about us!
"The gospel, while honoring our experience,
doesn't begin with our experience...
it begins at an impossible place, the tomb."
~Eugene Peterson, Christ Plays in Ten Thousand Places
doesn't begin with our experience...
it begins at an impossible place, the tomb."
~Eugene Peterson, Christ Plays in Ten Thousand Places
NEWSFLASH - It's not about us!
During the passion week (the original one) - the disciples argue amongst themselves who will be greatest. The crowds shout with joy as Jesus enters Jerusalem, because they think he's going to wipe out their Roman oppressors. Five days later - the same crowd who was excitedly proclaiming truth about Jesus (Behold the King) would now yell, "Crucify Him!"
Peter - who proclaims, "Not me - I'll go to prison and even die for you" ends up thrice denying any association with Jesus as a self-protective measure.
Judas, who disdains the waste of Mary's extravagant anointing of Jesus' feet, runs off at the first chance to cash in for an insider trade secret.
If He's not going to be a God who does what I want or makes me too uncomfortable - away with him.
And so goes the thinking of a postmodern North America! Oh we are a fickle people!
But the gospel is not centrally about us. Yes, we are the object of His deep affection - the recipient of His selfless love: "For God so loved the world that He gave..."
Peterson points out that Jesus' birth, death and resurrection are beyond us: "[It] is something we cannot do for ourselves; cannot take credit for, cannot take over and run with, cannot reproduce in any way. It is done for us. We can only hear and believe and enter this God-for-us reality that is so generously given as both the context and the content of our lives" (p. 231).
"The do-it-yourself, self-help culture of North America has so thoroughly permeated our imaginations that we don't give much sustained attention to the biggest thing of all, resurrection. And the reason we don't give much attention to it is because the resurrection is not something we can use or manipulate or control or improve on" (p. 232).
IT IS NOT ABOUT US!
So, how do we give "sustained attention to the biggest thing of all"?
I haven't finished the book to find out Peterson's prescription. But perhaps today - as I reflect on Jesus' betrayal and arrest - perhaps I can repent of any way I have tried to use, manipulate, control or improve/alter God's plan (and perhaps even my own imagination of what he can do for me and my life).
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
Oh resurrected Christ - in the Passion week your closest guys seemed only to be concerned with themselves. We've not evolved to be any better now. Easter services become our opportunity to showcase all we have to offer as a church - children come dressed in their new lace and ribbons - the focus so easily detoured to self and self-promotion.
Oh Risen Christ - seated at the right hand of the Father
Oh Exalted King - in whom all authority resides
Oh lamb who was slain for the sins of the world, You alone who are worthy and able...
Forgive our narcissistic culture who would have the audacity to think that we could market a "new & improved" Easter not much different than marketing a "new & improved" toilet bowl cleaner which will make your bowl sparkle and shine while eliminating stains and odors.
Woo my heart to have sustained attention on You.
"By the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace was not without effect"
~Paul - 1 Corinthian 15:10
My hands are off...
give me ears to hear,
hands to receive and
courage to enter your God-for-us reality.
May your grace have it's effect in and through my life.
During the passion week (the original one) - the disciples argue amongst themselves who will be greatest. The crowds shout with joy as Jesus enters Jerusalem, because they think he's going to wipe out their Roman oppressors. Five days later - the same crowd who was excitedly proclaiming truth about Jesus (Behold the King) would now yell, "Crucify Him!"
Peter - who proclaims, "Not me - I'll go to prison and even die for you" ends up thrice denying any association with Jesus as a self-protective measure.
Judas, who disdains the waste of Mary's extravagant anointing of Jesus' feet, runs off at the first chance to cash in for an insider trade secret.
If He's not going to be a God who does what I want or makes me too uncomfortable - away with him.
And so goes the thinking of a postmodern North America! Oh we are a fickle people!
But the gospel is not centrally about us. Yes, we are the object of His deep affection - the recipient of His selfless love: "For God so loved the world that He gave..."
Peterson points out that Jesus' birth, death and resurrection are beyond us: "[It] is something we cannot do for ourselves; cannot take credit for, cannot take over and run with, cannot reproduce in any way. It is done for us. We can only hear and believe and enter this God-for-us reality that is so generously given as both the context and the content of our lives" (p. 231).
"The do-it-yourself, self-help culture of North America has so thoroughly permeated our imaginations that we don't give much sustained attention to the biggest thing of all, resurrection. And the reason we don't give much attention to it is because the resurrection is not something we can use or manipulate or control or improve on" (p. 232).
IT IS NOT ABOUT US!
So, how do we give "sustained attention to the biggest thing of all"?
I haven't finished the book to find out Peterson's prescription. But perhaps today - as I reflect on Jesus' betrayal and arrest - perhaps I can repent of any way I have tried to use, manipulate, control or improve/alter God's plan (and perhaps even my own imagination of what he can do for me and my life).
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
Oh resurrected Christ - in the Passion week your closest guys seemed only to be concerned with themselves. We've not evolved to be any better now. Easter services become our opportunity to showcase all we have to offer as a church - children come dressed in their new lace and ribbons - the focus so easily detoured to self and self-promotion.
Oh Risen Christ - seated at the right hand of the Father
Oh Exalted King - in whom all authority resides
Oh lamb who was slain for the sins of the world, You alone who are worthy and able...
Forgive our narcissistic culture who would have the audacity to think that we could market a "new & improved" Easter not much different than marketing a "new & improved" toilet bowl cleaner which will make your bowl sparkle and shine while eliminating stains and odors.
Woo my heart to have sustained attention on You.
"By the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace was not without effect"
~Paul - 1 Corinthian 15:10
My hands are off...
give me ears to hear,
hands to receive and
courage to enter your God-for-us reality.
May your grace have it's effect in and through my life.
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
WNP? - Bracelets anyone?
A few years ago there was the WWJD rage: What Would Jesus Do?
There were bracelets, rings, t-shirts, and, in general, WWJD paraphernalia ad infinitum ad nauseum.
I propose a new bracelet/t-shirt/coffee mug, key chain/frisbee: WNP?
Huh?
Well in my on-going mid-life crisis, I continually am asking God, "What do you want me to do? What am I suppose to do with my life?" In the midst I've created at least 5 business cards and brochures for 5 different business ideas - from teaching golf, to recording, to worship leading to writing to speaking and life coaching.
This morning, I was reading and meditating on Romans 8:15 -
"This resurrection life you received from God is not a timid, grave-tending life. It's adventurlously expectant, greeting God with a childlike, 'What's next, Papa?'"
or
WNP?
Imagine starting every day by greeting God with such adventurous expectancy:
"Goodmorning Papa. Thanks for a good night sleep. You know all that is ahead in my day and week, but 'What's next, Papa?'"
And Papa tells you - and you do it - and it's hard and beautiful but you feel in sync with who God made you to be.
Another friend just wrote about helping out with Katrina restoration efforts...she said that they had ATL days - "As the Lord leads." The goal - listen and obey. That's it. Listen and obey - and be amazed (and not) at how incredible Papa knows His children.
So - join me. If you are stuck...why not quiet yourself, lean in and ask, WNP?
www.paulagamble.com
There were bracelets, rings, t-shirts, and, in general, WWJD paraphernalia ad infinitum ad nauseum.
I propose a new bracelet/t-shirt/coffee mug, key chain/frisbee: WNP?
Huh?
Well in my on-going mid-life crisis, I continually am asking God, "What do you want me to do? What am I suppose to do with my life?" In the midst I've created at least 5 business cards and brochures for 5 different business ideas - from teaching golf, to recording, to worship leading to writing to speaking and life coaching.
This morning, I was reading and meditating on Romans 8:15 -
"This resurrection life you received from God is not a timid, grave-tending life. It's adventurlously expectant, greeting God with a childlike, 'What's next, Papa?'"
or
WNP?
Imagine starting every day by greeting God with such adventurous expectancy:
"Goodmorning Papa. Thanks for a good night sleep. You know all that is ahead in my day and week, but 'What's next, Papa?'"
And Papa tells you - and you do it - and it's hard and beautiful but you feel in sync with who God made you to be.
Another friend just wrote about helping out with Katrina restoration efforts...she said that they had ATL days - "As the Lord leads." The goal - listen and obey. That's it. Listen and obey - and be amazed (and not) at how incredible Papa knows His children.
So - join me. If you are stuck...why not quiet yourself, lean in and ask, WNP?
www.paulagamble.com
Thursday, April 06, 2006
Assurance and confidence?
From my poetic friend, Shae, who is a missionary in Rome.
-----------------------------
I find myself questioning what my
ASSURANCE and CONFIDENCE is based
upon: is it on my efforts and ability….
others’ opinion and encouragement….
the church….
my ability to think, try,
win, smile, give, wake up early, save,
persevere, challenge, quote the right
scripture…
God help us understand and walk rightly.
-------------
www.xanga.com/nogoodthing
http://onlyabreath.blogspot.com
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