Stunning and Running

“The crowd watched Jesus in awe as he came toward them,
and then they ran to greet him.” Mark 9:15 (NLT)

Jesus has just been up on the mountaintop with Peter, James and John. While there, he was “transfigured.” The greek word is metemorphothe. Kenneth Wuest’s expanded translation says, “The manner of His outward expression was changed before them, that outward expression coming from and being truly representative of His inner nature.” He’s dazzling white – Peter, James and John are stunned – terrified, actually. Moses and Elijah show up to talk with Jesus and oh my…

When they come down the mountain they see a great crowd gathered around the other 9 disciples and the teachers of the law arguing with and/or taunting the 9 for a failed healing.

Jesus and the three disciples first saw the antlike figures below – a myriad of colors mixing and milling about – the mass expanding as others were rushing in to see what the commotion was. Drawing closer they could see the other 9 disciples surrounded by some teachers of the law. Evidently there was trouble…again. By the hand motions and scowls, they knew there was an argument going on. As the four got closer they could hear the heated voices of the teachers as well as the din of shuffling feet and the animated whispers of gossip: “Did you hear what happened?” “Did you see that the disciples failed to heal the boy?” “Why isn’t Jesus here?”

This huge crowd – just another huge crowd that always pops up in the book of Mark – suddenly are distracted. They see Jesus coming down the mountain with Peter, James and John. First I must ask, what was it about him that made them watch with awe? Wasn’t he a mere man walking down the mountainside? Was he still dazzling white – aglow like Moses after Mt. Sinai? What made him so noticeable?

When Jesus comes toward us – it inspires awe. The NAS calls it “amazement.” NIV: “overwhelmed with awe.” NLT: “awe”; Message: “admiring excitement.” The greek word, ekthambeo, means an intense surprise that gives a certain emotional shock. Jesus – merely walking toward them – inspired awe. He stopped the arguments and stilled the clamor of gossip as well as the scuffle of sandaled feet. If he had no majesty to attract us to him – why was he so alluring now? He took everyone’s breath away much like a beautiful sunset which begs us to behold and absorb in stillness and wonder. Our God conscious wants to be overcome by the moment – ponder nothing – respond simply with our focused attention. We soak it in with the hopes that there is something more than our intellectual arguments, piddly gossip and family crises.

Jesus – ever coming toward us; ever initiating; ever extending a hand of healing, grace and mercy. Jesus, who before this moment has recently healed a deaf/mute, fed 4000 and restored sight to the blind – now coming toward this astonished throng. Despite all their arguing, all their deficiencies, all their gossip – the entire crowd runs to greet him. As I try to imagine this scene, I am befuddled. Only Jesus could inspire both shocking awe and the ensuing eager reaction to run to the One who inspires wonder.

Jesus – come toward me this day. It is a normal day that may have arguments and distractions and unfulfilled desires. But give me the eyes to see you coming to me all day – that my heart may be inspired with awe, that my feet might be eager to run to you – to greet you – to welcome you to enter into my squabbles and struggles; To walk with you, though I don’t understand everything. Lead me this day to behold you with my own unveiled face and heart, that your ever-freeing Spirit might transform me.

Speed Malfunction

“You break the law of God in order to protect your own tradition.
Such worship, which honors God with lips but not with heart, is a farce” 7:13

On my own I cherish and protect self – “Look out for #1” is the mantra that Madison Avenue has purported.

Unfortunately, I was meditating on “breaking” the laws of God while I was driving up to my parents’ house. While wagging my proverbial finger at the modern day Pharisees I know, I was rushing up to the hospital as my mom broke her ankle. But truth is, every trip up I drive 5-8 mph over the “maximum” speed limit. It is acceptable and we all know that the cops will most likely not stop you unless you’re going 10+ miles over.

As I was justifying my “little” speed malfunction, I realized that our society is built on “fudging.” A little white lie is okay. We can fudge on our taxes – in our work – in our relationships – in retelling a story to make it sound more amazing than it really was. In America, the “end” is the altar at which we bow – the means are less important.

The means, however, are everything to Jesus. The Pharisees said all the right words – followed all the prescribed behaviors. Sure, sometimes they fudged on and misinterpreted a few things – like justifying not having money to help the parents because it all went to God – but on the outside they looked good. Their behavior was safe – within the limits of acceptability.

I’m grateful that Jesus picked disciples who were less than perfect in their “means.” Peter was a “foot in mouther” and denier. Peter, James and John fell asleep praying. Martha was a worrier. The Samaritan woman divorced more than once. Timothy had an ulcer. And the Sons of Thunder were always fighting over who would be the greatest. The disciples had many moments where they didn’t understand – didn’t want to serve – didn’t do things right and well and perfect.

With Jesus, he is far more concerned with our hearts vs. going through all the motions to appear to be achieving the proper “ends.”

Will I stop speeding – not likely. Well maybe. But I want my heart to be receptive to God’s leading with less justifying and fudging.

Fuzzy Sight - Mark 8:22-38

“Who do people say I am?”
“Who do you say I am?”

Peter got it right that day – “You are the Messiah.” Peter had seen Jesus heal the blind (they see) the lame (they walk) and set free prisoners. But Peter, trained to view the world through traditional Jewish eyes, would never have expected the Messiah to suffer! So when Jesus starts telling them that he would have to suffer and be rejected (even more) by the religious leaders and eventually be killed and rise again…well, Peter was put off, “Heaven forbid, Lord! This will never happen to you!”

Jesus sharply responds, “Get behind me Satan! You are seeing things merely from a human point of view, not from God’s”

For 2 ½ years Jesus has chipped away at Peter’s naiveté and pre-conceived (yet erroneous) notions of the Messiah. The poor and destitute flock to him while the priests and religious scholars plot to kill him. The ones whose eyes should be trained to see him, have totally missed him.

Jesus has just healed a blind man at Bethsaida. On the outskirts of the village, Jesus spit on the man’s eyes, laid his hands on him and asked, “Can you see anything now?”
“Yes…but the people look like trees walking around.”
Jesus placed his hands over the man’s eyes again. And as the man stared intently, his sight was completely restored!

This is not a story about whether Jesus was powerful enough to heal the man. Nor do I think it’s included in scripture just to encourage us (especially us in the West) that Jesus sometimes chooses to heal “progressively.” The placement of this story is no mistake. As in real estate, it’s all about location, location, location.

Right before Jesus asks his disciples to declare who he is, they still do not see fully. They still have a “fuzzy” perception of who he is and how he will function. Again, the Messiah, according to their Jewish tradition, would come riding in on a white horse to save his people. In a short time, he’ll come riding in on a donkey! The people wondered if this miracle working man from Nazareth would deliver them from the oppressive Roman Empire. So when Peter rebukes Jesus, “Never” Jesus says, “You are seeing things merely from a human point of view, not from God’s”

It’s all about seeing. Not that we live by sight, because we know we are to live by faith, not sight. But Paul prays for the Ephesians that the “eyes of their hearts” might be opened so that they can know him better. Jesus is in the process of helping us to see spiritually more clearly – to behold new wineskins, not merely manmade fabrications of tradition and comfortable theology.

Peter got the Messiah part right – but he was fuzzy on how that would play out. Most of us get the “Jesus is God” part right – but are equally as fuzzy when it comes to seeing how that might include putting aside our selfish ambition, shouldering our cross and following him – even when it remains a bit fuzzy and incomprehensible. We are so easily tempted to view life and God from our human, finite perspective that has a propensity for self, comfort, safety and pleasure.
“If you give up you life for my sake and for the sake of the Good News, you will find true life.”
What’s so fuzzy about that?

So today, Lord, how may I give up a selfish desire for your sake and for the sake of the Gospel? I know that doing so is not an innocuous, isolated or random act. I know that doing this pushes back the effects of the fall. I know too, it will raise the ire of the enemy.
You are Messiah – and I do still have fuzzy eyes that often prefer a finite view of you. You’re “safer” that way. But I want to continue to stare intently at you and your word til I can see you rightly and follow you courageously.

www.paulagamble.com

Rowing the "Red Eye"

This morning as I read Mark 6, I am struck at the varying emotions the disciples feel in following Jesus: no doubt as they were straining at the oars they were feeling frustrated. Going back over the past few days, we can see that they had returned from their short term missions trips all excited and ready to tell Jesus all the stories of what they saw happen. But the crowds were so constant in their coming and going, that Jesus and his guys didn’t even have time to eat.

So Jesus says, “Let’s get away from the crowds for a while and rest.” Very comforting words to anyone who has just returned from a short-term mission trip or too many busy frenetic days!
All they wanted to do was to go away with the Master – And yet, when the people saw them leaving many of them “from many towns” ran ahead and were waiting there when they landed.

Not just a couple dozen – but more than 5000!

So much for the quiet time of rest with the Master.

Jesus has compassion on them and so he spends all day teaching and then miraculously feeding them, then sends the crowds away. Finally – time alone with the master.

But wait – no - “Immediately after this, Jesus MADE his disciples get back into the boat…”
I admit I don’t really like this verse. I’d much rather have Jesus give good suggestions to these weary men:
“Hey guys, why don’t you head back and I’ll join ya later…”
“I’m heading up into the hills, but you can do whatever.”
“I know you’re tired, but why don’t you go back across the lake – I’ll stay here and maybe the people won’t follow you.”

No – he MADE them get into the boat. My guess is that they were not real thrilled to row the “red-eye” boat back across the lake in the middle of the night after a very long and frustrating day.

Now at 3am they are out in the middle of the lake – “straining at the oars” in yet another miserable storm. But at this time, Jesus comes walking to him on the waves. Naturally, they were terrified, thinking that Jesus must be a ghost. Yet Jesus reassures them, “It’s me. Don’t be afraid.” Jesus climbed into the boat – the wind stopped and the disciples were astonished by what they saw.

Frustration, terror, astonishment – it’s no wonder they didn’t understand Jesus. Who was he? How could he soften their hearts to believe? He was so unpredictable – seemingly preferring the crowds over themselves.

Sometimes the way Jesus comes to us will terrify us and/or frustrate us and/or astonish us. We will not always be able to wrap our finite brains around his infinite ways and means. I far too often want to understand the significance of events…but when wallowing in my own unmet needs and weariness, my heart is hard and I fail to believe.

As my friend Jan Meyers writes in her book, Listening to Love we usually respond to God’s leading in three ways: “Is that you Lord?” then so many times when you realize it is his voice there is that, “Oh no, it IS you Lord!” Prayerfully, as we continue to lean into him during the uncertainties, we can arrive at the ability to say, “Oh Good it’s you Lord.” Life is still crazy and frenetic and difficult to understand – but you are with us.

Lord, sometimes I admit that I am terrified of you because you are so unpredictable and I cannot understand your ways. So I ask for the courage to trust you and to recognize you whenever and however you show up. Oh how I need you!

www.paulagamble.com

Go and Find Out

“How much food do you have – go and find out.”

These are the last words weary, hungry, frustrated men want to be doing. They were all excited to get away with Jesus and share with him all about their adventures. But as they’ve slipped away to a quiet place, hoping to relax in the beauty of Galilee, along the lakeshore with great food and fellowship - once again the throng of desperate men and women overwhelmed them – running ahead of them to meet their boat as it landed on shore. Jesus took time to teach the crowds for he had compassion on them – he saw them as sheep without a shepherd.
The disciples – well, they only seemed – disappointed. The disciples came and politely to Jesus that he dismiss them to go and find food at this late hour. Jesus merely replies: “You feed them.”
As they look around at an endless sea of hungry faces, one of the disciples calculates the potential cost – “But that’d take 8 months wages – a small fortune.”
Translated: impossible! “Uh Jesus, we have no food, no money and more than 5000 hungry mouths!”
“How much food do you have – go and find out.”
Jesus isn’t asking them to go find a fortune or go raise a fortune or even to figure out how to acquire the resources to mass produce the bread needed to feed the crowd. His request is to take inventory. “Go and find out what you have.”
So much of our “going” with Jesus is so much like this: Abram was told – “Go to a land I will show you.” No final X on a map marking the spot. Moses was told – “Go to Pharoah…” knowing full well Moses was not eloquent and liked to make excuses. We are told – “Go and make disciples of all nations” with or without a fortune and resources.

I am so quick with my excuses – “But all these things would take a small fortune and a lot of planning. It’s impossible. Let me build up my resources first, then..."

Jesus merely says, “Start with what you have – take inventory.”

I have a guitar, a pen, a laptop, some training and experience, some puzzle pieces of spiritual retreat weekends... I am so overwhelmed by the future, I often cannot move in the present.

Today I will choose to bring it to the One who can bless it, break it, multiply it and fully satisfy His heart to see the shepherdless connect with the Shepherd.

What do you have? Start today by placing it in the Shepherd's hands - and watch how he will bless and multiply it as you go...

The Herods' Bloody Trail

“Herod was in awe of John –
whenever Herod listened to John,
he was miserable with guilt –
and yet he couldn’t stay away.
Something in John kept pulling him back…”
Mark 6 – The Message

Whenever the name Herod appears in the Bible –a bloody trail of heinous tragedy ensues. This Herod (the one who orders John the Baptist beheaded) was Herod Antipas – son of Herod the Great. You’ll remember Herod the Great as the one who slaughtered all the innocent infant and toddler boys under the age of 2 in Bethlehem. Papa Herod had been known for ruthless killing before. Jewish historian Alfred Edersheim comments, “The murder of a few infants in an insignificant village might appear scarcely worth notice in a reign stained by so much bloodshed.”[Edersheim, 149] Evidently, this irreverent monarch was accustomed to such atrocities. The ancient historian Josephus failed to record Herod’s massacre in Bethlehem. Whether for fear of his own life, or simply because he did not think it worthy, we are only left with what Matthew reports for us in his gospel. And here, in only one verse, the scripture merely alludes to the resulting mayhem: “A voice is heard in Ramah, weeping and great mourning, Rachel weeping for her children and refusing to be comforted, because they are no more.”[Matthew 2: 18 and Jeremiah 31:15].

Eleven to thirteen years after Herod unleashed his jealous terror, there would be no Bar mitzvahs in Bethlehem. No pre-teen boys would head off to the Yeshiva to prepare for their big coming of age ceremony. There would be a two year hiatus where all of those present on that fearful day – the day of Herod’s massacre – would have to remember. Their minds would relive the horrid echoes of scampering feet through the narrow streets: a scream, steel against bone, and the moan of beloved neighbors. They would remember the taste of the bloody, sweaty air as they bent over the still warm corpse of the boy, who minutes ago had filled their hearts with delight and hope. They would reluctantly open up their grievous wounds and be reminded that their sons “are no more.”

The fury of a fearful despot is devastating. Kathleen Norris, who has a penchant for poetic observation, says this about Herod: “Herod’s fear is like a mighty wind, it cannot be seen, but its effects dominate the landscape.”[Kathleen Norris. Amazing Grace: A Vocabulary of Faith. (New York, NY.: Riverhead Books, 1998) 225]. Herod feared that another king, even a mere toddler, might rain on his parade. His power, coupled with his overwhelming desire to maintain his position and reputation at all cost, propelled him into “furtive, pathetic and futile attempts at self-preservation.”[Norris, 225].

Herod the Great’s son, Herod Antipas, learned his own “furtive, pathetic and futile attempts at self-preservation” from his father. Herod Antipas was a fickle man – one moment hanging on John’s every word and protecting him – the next being disturbed to the core. And at the request of his niece, (acting as the emissary of revenge for Herod’s enraged wife, Herodias), Herod with exceeding sorrow, orders John the Baptist beheaded. He did it in order to save face in front of his distinguished guests. I cannot imagine what it must have been like to be in that room when John’s head arrived on a platter. Did heads turn in disgust? Did anyone cringe? Or were they all bloodthirsty, arrogant and engrossed onlookers?

Herod succumbed to the same fate as Pontius Pilate – caving into the crowd instead of living out a heart conviction. It’s no surprise, then, that Herod and Pilate became friends a few years later at Jesus’ trial.

It’s easy for me to think that I could never be as evil as these wicked, selfish, pathetic men. And yet, each time I yield to my propensity to people please, instead of standing up for what is right, I edge toward the susceptibility for sanctioning (consciously or subconsciously) a greater evil. Fear always devastates the landscape – and apart from God’s help to make me more valiant in conviction and action, I will only remain fickle and floundering – tossed about on the waves from living double-minded.

www.paulagamble.com

Mark 6:6-13 - No special equipment

Jesus Sends Out The 12

“Don’t think you need a lot of extra equipment for this.
YOU are the equipment.
No special appeals for money.
Keep it simple.”
~Mark 6:8-9 The Message


How contrary to most of our ministry efforts – we worry more about our budgets, support goals and packing lists than we do about preparing ourselves holistically (including physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and socially as opposed to just financially).

I remember reading a Japanese Christian’s perspective he wrote after working with American Christians seeking to reach Japanese with the gospel. Most indicting was his observation that when Americans seek God in prayer, they ask most for the resources to accomplish a task. They ask God for money to accomplish the mission (to build a larger building or to fund a super duper outreach) – more than they just ask God to show Himself. The Americans will not move forward without the provision of money – “Lord, bless these plans we’ve made by providing $4 million” rather than “Lord you have told us to go…and we believe you will provide for us and show us what to do as we step out in faith.”

God reminds His people over and over again in the scriptures, money is not necessary for Him to act! A sling and a stone defeat the giant – not the massive, SUV - sized armor; 300 men with torches and glass jars defeat 135,000 with chariots and steel weaponry; others march around the city for 7 days (during post-op circumcision recovery time, no less) – and then blow their trumpets – seeing the wall of Jericho fall; an innocent man dies on a cross between two criminals – deserted by his friends and yea, even his father - and raises from the dead to defeat death. None of these were seemingly strategic. There was not much rationale. They were not “resource” dependant efforts for the Kingdom.

Guilty as charged. The recent strategic planning and integration of business principles into ministries has some merit – but I have sat through way too many meetings where the result was we need more resources (money, infrastructure and people). And as a missionary who “raises” support in an organization that sets strategic plans and support goals – how then, now, shall I live?

The disciples, in this case, were expected to procure resources from the hospitality of others. In Matthew’s account they are told to intentionally search out worthy ones in the city they enter – and accept without hesitation their hospitality – which is their due payment for their work.

My fear is this: Christians are cheap. And yet clearly, the Bible says those who preach the good news are to be supported by those who benefit from it (1 Cor 9:14). Increasingly, fewer Christians are hospitable – no time to open their homes, share a meal, volunteer to rake a neighbor’s yard. They have more debt from spending money on their own houses and have less discretionary time and money to spend it on God’s. Haggai was called to confront a similar mentality in the Israelites – we should take note of the Lord’s response: “Why are you living in luxurious houses while my house lies in ruins? My house lies in ruins while you are all busy building your own fine houses.” (1:4,9 NLT).

Will I live out this theology?

· That I believe God knows and cares for and will provide my need (matt 6);
· That He is able to provide – at the minimum - daily bread/manna.
· That He is the One who owns the cattle on a 1000 hills (Ps. 50:10) and can even prompt a pagan King (Cyrus) to resource His purposes (Ezra 1)
· That “everything in the heavens and on earth is yours, O Lord…everything we have has come from you, and we give you only what you have already given us!” (1 Chron 29: 11, 14)
· That I am to search for worthy people who are hospitable…


I am the equipment. You are the equipment.

Though we can employ technology – the internet/telephone and television – “tell a person” is still the most effective means of sharing the good news: 2x2, seeking out worthy one’s who are willing to extend hospitality.

He Tripped Them - Mark 6:3

They tripped over what little they knew about him
and fell,
sprawling.
And they never got any farther.

Mark 6:3 – The Message


We all have prejudices – automatic systems that judge and label others according to our home culture’s biases and the preferences instilled in our upbringing. And when someone acts outside our expectations we can have one of two responses: a pleasant surprise – or deep offense. With Jesus – on this day, it was the latter.

He was only familiar to them by profession and family. And in a humble town the size of Nazareth – everyone knew everything about everyone else. There were no secrets. Early on such scandal centered around Mary and Joseph – pregnant out of wedlock – off to Bethlehem while so far along in her pregnancy. They were away for a few years – and a bit of hubbub surrounded their return after a few years in Egypt. Most of that had died down. Until recently. When he decided to preach in the local synagogue on the Sabbath – they were somehow deeply offended and refused to believe. “Who does he think he is? He is only a carpenter – the scandalous son of Mary.”

The ability to judge can be useful – like when you see and sense a dangerous stranger approaching you and you are able to steer clear of trouble. Sometimes discernment can prevent unwanted and unwarranted difficulties. More often than not, however, we trip over what little we know about people. It is easy and within our human nature to judge the book by the proverbial cover – not opening ourselves to understanding the humanity beneath – the Imago Dei – Image of God that resides within both white trash and Harvard grad. And just as we so easily trip over ignorance of people – we can so easily trip over our preconceived, yet incomplete notions of who Jesus is.

Philip Yancey, in his book, The Jesus I Never Knew unpacks how his childhood Sunday school lessons on Jesus were far different than the one he was experiencing now:

In physical appearance, Jesus favored those who would have been kicked out of Bible college and rejected by most churches. Among his contemporaries he somehow gained a reputation as a ‘wine-bibber and a glutton.’ Those in authority, whether religious or political, regarded him as a troublemaker, a disturber of the peace. He spoke and acted like a revolutionary, scorning fame, family, property, and other traditional measures of success.
Jesus, I found, bore little resemblance to the Mister Rogers figure I had met in Sunday school, and was remarkably unlike the person I had studied in Bible college. For one thing, he was far less tame (15-16, 23).

Michael Card calls Jesus the Scandalon – the one on whom every person shall sometime trip: “The stone that makes men stumble and the rock that makes them fall.” Card writes:

The heart of our offense with Jesus is that He fails to meet our expectations… Everyone who comes to know Jesus stumbles because of Him. He fails to meet our wrong expectations. He calls us to do impossible things or to become something we think we could never become. This is His way of teaching us how much we need Him. He breaks us to pieces so that He can put us back together in His image.” (Another Jesus is preached in America. He is different altogether. He never does anything unexpected He is safe and predictable and easy to follow. He answers every prayer that is formulated correctly and accompanied by the right ‘love gift.’ He is easily ‘stepped over.’ That is not the Jesus of the Bible. The last thing He is, is safe. (Immanuel: Reflections on the Life of Christ, p. 85).

Where is the gentle shepherd who leads us beside still waters and restores our soul?

Jesus tripped them.

I don’t think Jesus is like the third grade bully at recess who intentionally trips you to make you the laughingstock of the playground. He isn’t tripping men and women to exert some sense of authority of power. Our own ignorance trips us – our misinformation, our laziness, our inability to let Him be astonishing and authoritative and powerful in our lives for fear we might be led into someplace uncomfortable and foolish (irrational, unsafe, unpredictable, threatening, etc.)

I am like the Nazarenes, at times. I can be so tempted to be astonished – but lazy. Afterall, pursuing and seeking to understand someone better takes so much effort – it’s easier to label someone – to write them off – to stuff them in a box that is manageable and degradable. I can measure my own success by their failures.

Missionaries fail because they assume. Marriages and friendships falter because they assume. Businesses struggle because they assume. The Church is fading in this world because we assume we know Jesus because we can recite doctrines, and principles and creeds. Now don’t get me wrong – doctrines and creeds are not bad. They are essential, necessary and good. But without pursuing the Christ behind the doctrine – the Living Word – the ever present, “God with us” – we will keep on tripping. He will act outside of our boxes and we will be faced with extending exorbitant amounts of energy shoving him back inside.

Or perhaps, we will courageously let Him reveal Himself with greater intimacy and power in and through our lives. This is the prayer of Paul for the Ephesians: That God would open the eyes of their hearts – to be given spiritual wisdom and understanding in order to know God better. In this age of infoglut, less of us are truly ignorant so much as we are lazy and fearful. Overwhelmed – naturally – this is a frenetic generation afraid to fall behind, afraid to get ahead, afraid to know and be known – to love and be loved. We say, “Information is power” but that is a misnomer. Info can change the outside – the buying habits, personal habits, and work habits.

Instead, more appropriately, intimacy is power. Knowing Him and being known by Him is power. Intimacy has the potency to strip our illusions, allay our fears, and call forth the courage that comes from knowing someone is for you – warts and all! Intimacy exchanges our preconceived and preferable labels and expectations with right and true, and yes, sometimes very threatening ones. Intimacy requires the greatest of valor – walking into the black cloud to where God is, rather than standing in the distance with the crowds who are discontented, fearful and would rather go back to the oppressive, yet predictable, slavery of Egypt. (Ex 20:21).

Lord I don’t want to trip over you because of my unwillingness to let you reveal more, because of my fear that you might be beyond my ability to manage,
because of my ignorance of your goodness and lovingkindness.
So I pray, too, that you’d open the eyes of my heart –
that I might not pigeon-hole you –
both for myself and as I teach and live out your love before others.
I want to go farther in relationship with you –
I’m inviting you to take me by the hand –
to reveal your mercy and might to me and through me.
And Lord, may you grant me grace and courage and wisdom to point others to You –
the Living Christ –
God with all authority –
God with us.
Not to the preconceived and pitiable,
more manageable
deity currently preferable in North America.

Good Friday - Falling To Pieces

“And Jesus told them,
Before the night’s over, you’re going to fall to pieces because of what happens to me…But after I am raised up, I, your Shepherd will go ahead of you, leading the way to Galilee…”
~Matthew 26:31-32 The Message

There are times in the journey where Jesus says, “You’re going to fall to pieces because of me.”
But wait, I thought Jesus would come make life orderly and balanced?

At what point do you tell new followers this? At what point do you tell them there are times when it’ll seem like following him brings an unraveling of heart, mind, family, friendships and all of life seems disoriented? How many times will you and I be tempted to desert Jesus because it’s too much…it’s just too much.

This is not a journey for the faint of heart. And yet – a faint heart surrendered to the Shepherd is always lead through the valleys – of weeping, trouble and even death. Oh – the absurdity of it all. But love is sometimes absurd and illogical. The greatest of tales – Romeo and Juliet, Mark Anthony and Cleopatra, Jesus and humanity - show the lengths of true love’s journey.

Oh Lord, may you help my heart to receive the fullness of your absurd love for me. And I’m not relishing falling apart – have been there – it was hellish. And yet you are my Shepherd – who has and will continue to go ahead to lead me out.

2000 Floating Pig Carcasses

Mark 5: 1-20 - Jesus heals a Demon Possessed Mad Man


So here's the scene: Jesus and his guys sail over to the shore - get out of their boat and a madman, who cuts himself with rocks and has rope burns and sores on his ankles and wrists where the people have tried to shackle him (but haven't been able to), runs up to them. The man lives among the tombs - night and day running about the mountains, crying out and "gashing himself with stones." Not only so, this man is full of a legion of demons - and Jesus, of course, demanded they come out. But instead, the demons beg Jesus to send them into a herd of 2000 pigs nearby. Jesus gives them permission to do so, and consequently the whole herd runs down the steep hill into the lake and drown.

Now I'm trying to imagine 2000 pig carcasses floating near the shore. (Coincidentally, when Jesus and his guys get back into the boat right after this encounter, they have to navigate through 2000 pig carcasses in the lake. Think of that!)

And, naturally the sight of 2000 dead, floating pig carcasses is a curiosity - so upon hearing of it, droves of people come from the town to gawk. And what they see frightens them. I find it odd that what frightened the onlookers this day was not a gashed up, filthy madman who could not be contained in ropes and shackles. What frightened them was seeing the madman "clothed and in his right mind." Jesus made him perfectly sane - "normal" - healed and whole.

The people begged Jesus, "Leave us alone."

Sometimes what Jesus does unshackles our nice, comfortable, predictable worlds. When our comfort, livelihood and personal possessions get altered/challenged/affected by Jesus - well unfortunately, we have grown too used to life with the madman. We don't know what to do with life with the sane man - and 2000 dead pigs floating in the lake. We say, "Jesus, you're too wild - I'd prefer to live with the demons - at least they're predictable. I've made adjustments - I've gotten used to them. I know life is not as full and rich and free as it can be, but I'm managing well enough. Leave me alone. Leave us alone."

What horrifying words - "Jesus, leave me alone!"

Reflection Questions:

• What areas of your life are "madmanish"? (i.e. you've tried to gain control and subdue it, but nothing has happened)?
• What fears, ignorance or selfishness interferes with you receiving God's help?
• Describe what life would be like if you were freed - perfectly sane, healed and whole?
• Are there areas of your life where you have consciously or unconsciously said, "Jesus, leave me alone!"?
• Invite Jesus to peel back your fingers and to let him free you. Lay your fears, ignorance, selfishness down before Him and say, "Jesus, you are wild and unpredictable - I want to be freed and I want trust you so do not leave me alone in this."

www.paulagamble.com